A Tribute to my support group then...and now

'Look at everything as though you were seeing it either for the first time or the last time. Then your time on earth will be filled with glory.'
Betty Smith, A Tree Grows in Brooklyn


+ + +

I read Ice Goddess' latest post and I really did feel for her because I was in the same situation before (my love story nga lang was doomed from the start).

I remembered a time when all I had beside me was my boyfriend. I stopped answering calls or texts from close friends and I closed myself to my family...because all that I was seeing was my then boyfriend. Well..you can say that my world solely revolved around him. Hmmm.

I know now that it wasn't healthy. I was thrown into the abyss when we finally broke off. I found myself alone. Absolutely alone with no one to talk to. I started to miss my friends and even my family. I know they're still there but I feared that I've reached a really far place that it'll be too hard to get back into their good graces.

I got over it. I finally took the courage to reach out and called them one by one. I was grateful that each of 'em offered me their shoulders and helped me get on my feet and breathe a whole new life.

So here's a tribute to the people who made me what I am now just by being there for me:

Nemo: We resigned from Etel at the same month. We both didn't have jobs with our hearts torn into pieces. We were both yearning for new lives and in the process, found each other. We now work for the same company/account. We now go out with the same group of friends. I owe you a lot. Thanks for just being there. I value the silent talks that we have. I love it that we can talk or comfort each other without even uttering a single word. We've gone through a lot and I'm glad we're still intact. Changes may come. It might even lead us to be apart from each other but rest assured that I will always be here. You know I'm not the vocal type but my prayers and thoughts always includes you and your daughter. Love you, bes.

Piper: Now I now the term 'misery loves company' does ring true. We would often laugh when we reminisce about that tragic phase we went through. How we would call each other and one would cry first and belt out angst and frustrations while the other one just listens. And after that, after the other's pacified, it's the other one's turn to wail and cry. It was funny when I think about it now but we were hopeless fools before. I remember a time when I would stay at your place and after downing a few shots of vodka (or was it tequila?)we would get into your car and drive by your ex-husband's work place or my ex-boyfriend's place just to check what they're doing. We both know now how pathetic we must have looked doing those crazy shit. But we were our own support group and for that I am utterly grateful.

Cage: Your apathetic approach to hearing out my wailings helped me also. Support groups should include someone who cries with you and someone who nonchalantly listens and even gives you a slap or two everytime you start making a fool of yourself. That was your role until now and I thank you for that.

Family: There are two good things that happened when I was broken-hearted; I was able to rekindle my connection with my friends and that I finally broke the huge wall separating me from my family. I thank you guys for not questioning me about the whole incident. I appreciate it that you guys kept mum whenever my crying would get louder even if you're all afraid the neighbors would start thinking there's someone being molested inside our home. Thanks for understanding why I needed to go out and even sleep at my friend's place during these times. It was because I didn't want you guys to hear my howling. I want you guys to see me as someone who is strong and can get over anything that comes my way. I guess all of you know by now that I'm really not that strong.

To the BIG GUY up there: Thanks for letting me meet these people. You know exactly what I needed and have given it to me. I thank You for that. I will try not to question your motives in the future.

*smiles



'If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it round. Trouble creates a capacity to handle it. I don't embrace trouble; that's you'll see a lot of it and had better be on speaking terms with it.'
Oliver Wendell Holmes